Fabulously Out There

Putting the Fabulous in East Boston since 2005 -I have written about my life, my dog(s), my sex life, my my love life, my dating, my non-dating, my job searches and my soul searches since 2005. This is my space and my opinions. I use my space freely and voice my opinions freely. I call my readers possums, cause it's a cute word, not because they aren't fabulous and stunningly handsome and beautiful. :)

Good Morning Mr. Skunk! September 30, 2009

Filed under: east boston,east boston; me — englandia @ 10:33 am

5:55 am.

A quiet walk with the dogs. The city lights flickering on the water. I am in deep thought.

I let Lani off the leash and girlfriend starts doing her business. Suddenly I see her ears perk up, which causes my “HOLY CRAP” ears to perk up as well.

I start with a low “Laniiiii…..?”

And *WHAM*, girlfriend takes off.

She takes off, but every time I call her, she slows down and looks at me.

Next thing I see is this black and white thing.

At which point every ounce of my body screams “LAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNIIIIIIIIIII”

I start running, dragging poor Fabulous Dog behind me. I swear to god, someone should bust me for dog dragging. Poor thing. He’s got 4 feet though, so he can move his ass instead of kissing the grass and being dragged through it.

My mind sees my worst case scenario: Brand new condo and skunk dog.

Lani proceeds to say Good Morning to Mr. Skunk.

Possums, this skunk was clearly not on top of his game. I am not sure if he had already emptied his fabulous stink on someone else, or if he’s just not a morning person, because my blond, beautiful dog was UP. HIS. ASS. TOUCHING.

Maybe he just didn’t perceive her as a threat.

At some point she turned around and came running toward me, but of course she was freaked out cause I was yelling her name, so she did a circle around me 3 times and I was perching my nose in the air like a Bloodhound searching for a blood sausage.

End result:

Dog didn’t get sprayed.

Little dog lost part of his dignity and has grass between his teeth after the dragging incident of 2009.

I stepped into a heaping pile of dog shit in my pursuit of Lani.

What a morning.


15 Responses to “Good Morning Mr. Skunk!”

  1. miss crazy Says:

    nice. whatta way to start a day ;)

  2. Not So Little Woman Says:

    Does it make me a bad person because I’m laughing? It’s your writing, which is as usual, awesome.

    I’m glad there’s no skunk stink to deal with and that Fabulous Dog survived.

    Dogs. Never a dull day with them in our lives.

  3. Amanda Says:

    Hilarious story!! So glad Lani didn’t get sprayed!

    Sounds like my furry boyfriend could use a snuggle. ;-)

  4. NSA IW Says:

    As a concerned epidemiologist – did the skunk actually bite or scratch your or Lani? If it ‘wasn’t on top of its game’, that makes me worried..

  5. NSA IW Says:

    As a concerned epidemiologist – did the skunk actually bite or scratch you or Lani? If it ‘wasn’t on top of its game’, that makes me worried..

    • fabulouslyinboston Says:

      I was worried too. But she’s fine and I didn’t get that close. She’s also vaccinated…but I will check her over again tongiht. I think if he had scratched her, she would have yelped and since she’s light, I can see things on her easily.

      Will check her over again tonight though.

  6. NSA IW Says:

    Just checking :-)

  7. charlotte Says:

    Well, then. I just received an emergency telegram from Fabulous Dog pleading to come visit us in California where dog drag racing is punished by death through tickling. Please put said fabulous canine on a plane immediately (first class only, of course) and send him out here!

  8. marcia Says:

    Whew!! Close call. Hilarious rendition. LOL

  9. AmyB Says:

    Hahaha! This sounds so nerve wracking, but I must say it gave me quite the much-needed chuckle! SO glad you didn’t end up having to administer a tomato juice bath today!

  10. Maribeth Says:

    Oh. You. Are So. Lucky!
    Mr. Fritz, your white boyfriend, got hit smack dab between the eyes over the summer. HOW AWFUL! After bathing with tomato juice, he became your favorite pink boyfriend!

  11. Tiffany Says:

    Oh sweet Hey-zeus! I juse oui-d myself a little!

  12. faegirl Says:

    I scared the crap out of a skunk near Wood Island and he didn’t even turn and attempt to spray. Maybe it was the same one…or they just don’t spray unless they are pissed off? Hmm

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